Shameful, but hilarious.

Me + Microwave = No bien.

Last night around 8:45 I tried to warm up a bagel by putting it in the microwave.

(I've done it lots of times before, okay?)

Anyway, as I was saying...

I left the room for a sec and when I came back in, I noticed something VERY, VERY odd.

SMOKE.

Yes. Smoke was seeping through the cracks of the microwave.

I immediately grabbed the bagel out of the microwave and ran to the hallway. Obviously I didn't move quick enough. Within seconds, the fire alarm in our room started blaring. It continued to do so for one hour.

Not to worry though...

Front desk man was peeing his pants because he didn't know what to do. Meanwhile, I was sweating my brains off trying to fan the smoke out (picture me standing on my bed, waving a towel in the air).

RING, RING.

Front desk man once again. He just wanted to let me know that the fire department had called...and they were on their way.

No big deal.

3 firemen showed up.

One of them was overweight to put it nicely, and neglected to wear a shirt.

Just his suspenders, coat, pants, boots, and beer belly.

AWESOME.

Even the three professionals couldn't turn the thing off.

Alas-

after one hour, multiple calls from the wet pants front desk man,

firemen knocking on my door, hotel neighbors giving dirty/judgey looks, and a very flustered, embarrassed, and nervously laughing self,

IT SHUT OFF.

Hallelujah.